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Last year I joined my friends Adam and Devan in passing out turkeys in Detroit for Christmas. We passed out the turkeys through their church, Calvary Assembly of God in Gibraltar, Michigan. In addition to turkeys we had several large boxes of clothes to distribute. One of the parishioners owns a business on the east side and also runs a church service out of his warehouse. The plan was pretty simple: people come in and get some clothes, they then get a turkey, then they can pray with some of the organizers if they so incline. It's important to note that people did NOT have to pray or be prayed for in order to receive the clothes or turkeys.
All in all, things went extremely well. It was great to see that there were many people who were extremely grateful to recieve the items and could have a great Christmas dinner. That doesn't mean that everyone was grateful though, and I'd say there was really three distinct types of people that we served at the food bank.
1. The truly grateful - The ones you want to give the bigger turkeys to. These people just wanted to have a good dinner and get some warm clothes, especially for their kids.
2. The grumpily unsatisfiable - These were the people that pushed through the line to see the clothes and then complained when they couldn't find what they wanted. When we handed them a turkey thy asked for a second turkey or a bigger one (we didn't comply). These people had a need for clothes and turkeys but were rude and pushy about it.
3. The professional handout receiver - This was the smallest group of people, and the most frustrating. These people had their own collapsible wire baskets so they would be able to get the biggest haul. They'd quickly sort through he clothes for name brands and expensive looking items. They'd settle for nothing but the biggest turkey. (Well, really they did, but not without protest. I may be dramatizing a bit, but only a little.) This third group had no interest in praying or being prayed for. Said one of the group: "I have ten thousand people waiting for me at home, I don't have time for this".
Despite the free loaders of group 3, it was still a fulfilling experience. We ran out of turkeys part way through, but took down names so those that didn't get a turkey could come back and get one the next week (from the guy who owned the warehouse). In the end we had helped about one hundred families get some warmth and dinner. The sense of pride and accomplishment overcame the frustration and disappointment of some of the greedier individuals.
It was a bit of an eye opening experience. I work in Detroit and know what life can be like in some of the poorer neighborhoods but it was a bit surprising that so many families could be in such need of help in such a small area. We were not serving the city of Detroit, only a very small percentage of it. One neighborhood, maybe two, no more than a square mile or so. After donating my time to pass out these turkeys I wonder if there was a single person in that neighborhood who was 'making it' - that is earning enough of a living to maintain a basic quality of life.
I've often struggled with donations in general. My fear that the type of people I described in group number 3 will be the sole recipients of my money. After giving out turkeys I have changed my mind. After seeing how much the people of group 1 not only needed the help but appreciated it, I realize that you need to do everything you can to help them, in spite of whomever may also benefit. It's said that 'it's better for ten guilty men to go free than for one innocent man to be wrongly imprisoned.' That's how I feel about charity now - you need to help those that need it, even if a large part is helping those that don't deserve it.
So I hope everyone out these takes a look at their neighborhood or checks with their local government or religious groups to see what they can do to help. Maybe you can donate your clothes, maybe you can leave some money, maybe you can volunteer your time. Whatever it is, I found out first hand that there's plenty of people out there who can use your help.
This reminds me of how I felt when I did Keeping Kids Warm. You have a variety of children being picky and greedy for a free coat. Non the less they do not always know better but we would get a glimpse of a parent who made it a priority to come into school with their child to pick out( or might I say look through 10 coats and walk behind our tables) their coat. They always wanted it wayyy to big or wayyy to small. Need less to say we still sent the child off with a just slighly too big coat so they could grow into it and a unhappy mother! It was satisfying to not only give they child what they needed or wanted(to the best of our abilities) but to also give the child all the attention and ignore the parent!
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you had such a experience! Sometimes we can get stuck in our own bubbles and do not realize who and what else is out there.
Thanks so much, John, for helping. It was great to have you work with us that day. I thought you might like to have a little follow up info.
ReplyDeleteFirst let me offer that next year you can go outside the warehouse with me when I have to announce to the crowd that we are out of turkeys... You can be my "security".
I know you were watching carefully and helping the process of getting the names of those who didn't get a turkey. Thanks again for trying to bring some "order" to that process. I want to report that EVERYONE who signed up and returned the next Sunday received a turkey. Those who got angry and stormed away didn't receive anything. Those who were patient and willing to come back were blessed. Overall, we gave out more than 1,200 pounds of turkey.
You should know that I too struggle with idea of "helping" the needy. I, like you, want to know that my "charity" (or the charity of others of which I am resposible)is not the victim of fraud and abuse. The Bible gives us guidelines for helping the needy... as a matter of fact, it says that we are to make sure that the recipients are indeed needy before we help them. In over 20 years of "doing what I do", I have learned a lot, and have developed some very practical methods for doing so.
However, the "turkey" event is one of those times where it is really not feasible to implement those stragedies. So, we go into this event knowing that there will be some, what I call, "colateral waste". It is going to happen. All we can do is try to keep it to a minimum. I am truly grateful for your wisdom and your "doing your best to do the right thing".
I look forward to working with you again. Thanks.
Sarah - You're so right, thank you for the comment. One of my personal driving goals of this blog was to leave that bubble and experience and celebrate the differences in people's situations and philosophies - ultimately to find and appreciate the similarities in all of us.
ReplyDeleteKC - Thank you very much for having me. I didn't go into it in the blog(it wasn't really in the scope of the blog), but your 'sermon' (if you call it a sermon, I don't know) was very touching and service was nice. I know you must have seen some very frustrating times in your many years of service, and perhaps my frustration stems mostly from my inexperience. In any event, I'd love to come along on this event next year, and will look forward to it.
Hey that's really cool how you voluntered for that. Good to know people still do things for free, and things that matter anyhow.
ReplyDeleteSo, I landed on your page through the michigan bloggers meetup. I am kinda excited to know more bloggers are coming to the area, I live in the border of mich and sylvania, ohio. Anyway take care, if you ever need anything don't hesitate to ask.
Thanks Wilson. I've been stagnant on this for a while, but will be getting back to it soon. It's been a whirlwind year, for sure. I've got a few experiences saved up, so I'll be ready to really promote this puppy soon.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the input.